Apron Anxiety

Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost.

Sat, 09 Feb 2013 11:45:00 -0500

You know how I always say, I’m a writer, not a blogger? Yeah, it just makes me feel better about my infrequent posts on this site, because I do have guilt about this Apron Anxiety universe which I love, which I consider the core of all good things, which I should be more affectionate, or at least flirtatious, towards…

In my defense (haha), I haven’t exactly been living under a rock — just a hut in Sri Lanka, a ranch in Malibu, and an 8th floor walk-up in Paris w/ two Tunisian strangers and their cigs & couscous. Point is, I’m around! And hell yes, I feel crazy lucky making a living listening/writing the true stories of chefs, shamans, nymphos and heroes all over the world . . . Like. Whoah.

For New York Mag, there was the amazing tale of Maggie Todd, who lost her hand in a jet-ski accident then found her inner-spirit at Per Se. Plus two sorority sisters in love, a Financial Dominatrix named Goddess Nia (READ IT everyone), a bunch of brutal breakup sagas, and some sweet food diaries.

For Bon Appétit magazine, I interviewed an Olsen, Seth Meyers, Kate & Andy Spade, a mystery champion athlete, and of course, Kelly Wearstler. I’ll let you google that one. On the record - my feeling about the outrage, or whatever, is (as always) LIVE & LET LIVE! Jesus!

In runaway news: Over the next few weeks I’m heading to Zurich, Gstaad, London (Paris for a night - if Ikbal ‘n Muhammad will have me back), Chile, then….I don’t know!! I don’t even want to know! Life will surprise me with something.

My week at the Malibu Ranch was extraordinary. It’s not at all the la-la-la luxe retreat you might think. Can’t say much until the story is published, but gotta say, those long, killer hikes, hours and hours alone in the woods with your true self, it changes you. Three words: Recovering Your Innocence.

Andddd less intense…I’m currently making almond brown rice pudding! Might bake a lemon marshmallow pie… classy riff on Fluff. BTW I wanted to call the second book Fluff (everyone said to forget it - i.e. no fun!). Anyway, need a break from my usual eats, as my blood-type is officially: Kale.

I’ll end here. Life is pretty good. My family is happy and healthy; my friends still love me even though I keep leaving the country on their kids’ birthdays. I’m dating, spinning, sleeping in peace. If someone stresses me out, I practice my mantra from Malibu, “Love them, love them, love them — then send them back on their journey.” Ahhh, so good!

My second book, not called Fluff, is all I can think about, yet there’s barely one word written. Well, maybe one word, and it’s a dirty, delicious swear made for downtown girls not Downton Abbey (another obsession, for another time).

Love you guys.
xxAlyssa

My Next Big Thing.

Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:49:26 -0400

Details are not my style. And I’ve been so preoccupied with my Financial Dominatrix and Both Sides of the Breakup and New York Diet stories that …being blunt… it’s hard to find time to blog at all. SORRY! That’s why I was reluctant to participate in this perky blog-it-forward Q/A sent to me by the talented and delightful Amy Thomas of God, I Love Paris and the book Paris, My Sweet. It all seemed too…mechanical for me. That said, how dysfunctional could I possibly be?! All I had to do was answer the questions below, and tag a couple writer-friends to take the torch next. Easy enough. And by the way, despite my April Ludgate kind-of mood, I’m honored you asked, Amy. I liked doing this a lot. Please & thank you…

Where did the idea come from for the book? I guess this means the post Apron Anxiety book? That one — which I have the title for but am too scared to say — is fiction. It’s dark. Smart. Sensual. It came from this idea that we all have these secrets and urges running through our veins — some more than others — and wouldn’t it be fun to explore that under the costume of a completely fictional character.

What genre does your book fall under? Fiction. My imagination is going fucking nuts.

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition? For AA, I keep envisioning Lake Bell as the star. I love the way she looks, but she’s also got this cool, Brooklyn spirit, as does the book. For the next one? Let’s bring back Winona Ryder.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book? A writer’s downward spiral.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?I’d love my Apron Anxiety editor, Emily Takoudes, at Random House, to take it on, but that’s only a dream so far.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript? For AA, it took about eight months for an entire draft, a little over a year with edits. For the next one, I’d assume the same.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre? Never compare.

Who or What inspired you to write this book? I’m very proud of Apron Anxiety. It has heart and humor, and it’s very me. BUT there’s a lot left inside….words and thoughts that were just too harsh, too much. As a writer, I still need to go there. A whole new book, within the safety of fictional characters, is what I need to examine some of the sinister stuff. Which, for people like me, is actually the drug of it all.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest? Well, I’m planning to write part of it while living in Europe. Where no one is watching.

Will let you know the authors up next ASAP….

To Rome With Love, and Not Enough Time.

Wed, 19 Sep 2012 12:24:25 -0400

I have resurfaced from the land of leaving my job and escaping to Europe. Physically at least. Mentally, I’m still somewhere in Italy with blistered feet, sun-kissed cheeks, liquirizia gelato, paprika Pringles and bummed puffs of cigarettes. I wasn’t ready to come home to New York where life is grand yet my silent partner is restlessness. I was having way too much fun with olive-skinned men crying “Alessia!” and a stomach warm with deep purple wine. Yet I had work to do — a whole life to rearrange, now that I’m free again, me again, unbound to any book tour, food blog or boyfriend. But I have to be honest. I feel a big change coming. Another book is pouring out of me, while I explore how and where to write it. It felt incredible to wake up excited every day in Rome, and I want that back. No. I need that back. Meanwhile, the book is doing so well. I can’t thank you enough for all the reviews, interviews, articles, tweets, recs to friends. Grazie mille.

Photo Cred: Lolita

Thirty Five.

Sun, 15 Jul 2012 19:07:31 -0400

Life works itself out. You just have to believe that, don’t you? The world would be way too scary otherwise. Although some days, if I’m being perfectly honest, for no real reason whatsoever, I start to wonder: But will it really? I turned 35 yesterday. Birthdays always fuck with me. It’s not really about the aging. Although, this year, it’s kind of about the aging. The real issue is examining the year behind and preparing for the year ahead. I am not melodramatic and I am not a worrier. But I do think life is ours to own, manage, set in motion…and it’s important to take inventory, to figure out what we want and how we’re going to get it. That, I guess, is where I’m at. WHAT’S NEXT? Seriously. In which direction do I move? I’m allowed to ask. What the hell comes next? 35 is a funny age, especially when 34 ended on such a high. The book, the romance, the overwhelming sense that this is my moment. Apron Anxiety is on the fast track to success; but then again, what is success? I’m supposed to be coasting, but it feels more like crashing. Tried to cook through my confusion. Made a giant pot of kale and quinoa salad w/ chickpeas and chicken sausage, and a platter of summertime chicken breasts roasted w/ cherry tomatoes and white and green asparagus. Felt better imagining my guy coming home to good food, brain food, girlfriend food. Then bought ripped jeans and cucumber serum. That helped too. Now I’m eating leftover birthday cake. Not quite spirited, not exactly sad. Just reminding myself that everything is alright. And it is. It totally is.

Forgive Me While I Slack For a Second

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 20:57:00 -0400

Justifying this outrageous blog’bandonment by telling myself that you’d rather me focus on serious bookstuff than some stream of consciousness ‘bout cold sesame noodles and salted caramel gelato. Just fake agree with me. Please? I feel bad. Here’s everything: Life has been unimaginably delicious. I’m hearing from people deep from my past and thrillingly in the future. Love and warmth is radiating from all directions. Extremely touching stuff, let me tell you. Anyway, I turn 35 next month, and while I’m definitely enjoying the moment, I can’t help but wonder…what’s next?

Can’t wait 4 Breaking Bad; converting from red to white; unapologetically into Joe Gorga; grilling lamb chops via Nineteen Charles; smitten by chickpeas @ La Vara; craving Kin Shop’s goat fried rice; very lovestruck; a little fat; eternally emulating Lake Bell’s breasts; unsure of my feelings for Girls; proud of our Grub Street Diet; turned off the instant-comment-option bc of some crazies - sux and sorry. Favorite press this week was the Bon App story, Elle, USA Today review, and a personal interview with a young-hearted blog called Small Chick Big ~~Dreams~~ Deals. I pasted it after the jump. Enjoy. All my gratitude, Alyssa….

SCBD: Alyssa I’m honored that I am able to interview you today. Thank you again for being so open to me interviewing you. You are truly an inspiration to a fellow writer like me. For any of the readers who haven’t read the book, when did you know you wanted to write as a career?
AS: I’m lucky because I’ve always wanted to be a writer, and knowing that has guided me from a very young age. The majority of people really stress out over ‘what to be” when they grow up, and that’s a legitimately tough issue, so I caught a break there. One less point of confusion in my life! Maybe I would have made a great private detective/FBI agent too. SO random, but it’s just the only other job I’ve ever even considered for like 2 seconds. No clue why?!

SCBD: I love the fact that you are down to Earth and honest throughout the entire novel. Many people have a certain idea or stereotype of food writers being experts out of the womb, but like anything it takes time to really know your craft. Do you agree?
AS: Oh totally! I am not a natural born food writer, it’s just the journalistic “hemisphere” where I wound up recently – and I’m trying to do a good job with it. I try to relate food to things I feel very comfortable with - like relationships, sex, sense of self. Even comparing food to TV, or wine to music…that makes it more fun for me. Otherwise, honestly, it’s just food. And it’s kind of boring. Actually, the food “scenes” in my book were harder than anything else for me to write…like, I could much easier express the saddest break up of my life, than the smell of slow-roasted tomatoes.

SCBD: In the book you mention doing some public relations work as well, I am currently working for a firm and took courses while I was in college. Do you think it’s good for a food writer/blogger to know it works and have those skills?
AS: It’s daunting figuring out where you belong creatively, especially in NYC where there are infinite opportunities. So it’s great to try out all sorts of jobs, that’s the only way you’ll know what’s right. PR seemed like a glamorous media-type gig, where I hoped there would be writing, but I honestly had no clue what the difference between PR, advertising, and editorial work was back then. What happened was, I kept pitching stories to these writers and reporters, and I was pitching them amazing stories because I was pretending to be on their end, fantasizing about how and what I would want to be pitched. Ultimately, I connected with the writers and reporters in a strong way because of that, so I was actually really good at PR. But the envy just kept growing. I wanted to be on the editorial end so bad, that was my calling and I knew it. But yes, VERY happy I worked in PR. I made incredible friends (all my best friends are in PR still – it’s crazy!). And knowledge is power.

SCBD: Like you, I’m still learning in the kitchen, in the book there are tons of recipes, what recipe do you recommend I try making first? Why?
AS: The chicken for “hungry and important” people is turning out to be one of the star recipes in the book. Delicious, healthy, easy. Or the Neiman Marcus Chocolate Chip cookies. Or the banana bread. Impossible to mess any of those up!

SCBD: What’s your personal secret to success? What do you think attributed to your success?

AS: Courage is Grace Under Pressure — it’s Hemingway, but someone I love and admire very much always said that, and I try to live by it. Because here’s the thing: life is hard. And life can be cruel. But I’ve always kept moving forward. Always held my head up high. And I think that mentality has kept me from getting stuck in bad situations, or buried in self-doubt. I’ve had just as many hardships and disappointments as anyone else, but I’ve always been resilient. I bounce back. The only tricky thing with that kind of inner-strength, as a writer or an artist, is preserving a certain inner-spirit too. Because you need both. You need to be tough, without being hardened. You need a thick skin but a beating heart.

SCBD: Working for New York Magazine is a big deal and writing for Grubstreet is a big deal in the food world, when you started your career did you ever think you’d end up there? Why?
AS: Writing for New York Magazine was definitely a dream. Grub Street was a big decision for me…I had a book coming out that demanded a ton of time and energy, and a personal life to rebuild after a bad breakup…However, I’m a major “When opportunity knocks” person. And I just knew that was an opportunity I had to grab hold of. Job offers like that don’t come around often. Even if I was scared (I was). Even if I felt completely out of my comfort zone (big time). I had to take it; there was nothing to discuss.

Alyssa Shelasky, writer for New York Magazine’s Grub Street and author of Apron Anxiety

SCBD: I love going out to eat, which is why I started my blog and every so often I cook. Before Apron Anxiety was a book, it started as a blog. What is your advice for young blogger like me? What do you think will happen in the blog world in the future? Do you think blogs can expand into more?

AS: I don’t think I would have gotten a book deal if there weren’t a blog. Having that platform is so important. It makes all the difference these days. But a blog is definitely a commitment, it comes w/ all those nonstop social media obligations, and a responsibility to your readers. It’s not as breezy as non-bloggers think!

Alyssa featured in Elle Magazine

SCBD: If the world was ending tomorrow where would you have your last meal out and with who and/or what would you cook/bake for? Why?
AS: Wow. It would be so much more about the company than the cuisine. It would be me, my family and my boyfriend, and maybe it would be like big, fresh delicious sandwiches on a picnic blanket somewhere, along with my mom’s brownies, and Dorito’s for my Dad and sister, and some old-fashioned bottles of Coca-Cola. But the thought of that makes me sad, actually. So, another scenario could be me and Clive Owen, and a lot of chocolate cake.

SCBD: Apron Anxiety also discusses dating, what’s the best dating advice you ever received? From who? Do you think what your boyfriend/girlfriend does can make a big difference in a relationship?
AS: I’ve always had a few older girlfriends who I think are just innately cool, unique people. And in awkward dating moments, I’ve sort of just pretended to be them. Yes, of course, you should always “be you,” but it’s only human to get scared and nervous around boys/girls you like. It 100% helps to channel women you look up to. My friend Pippa Lord from SousStyle.com asks herself, “What would Madonna do?” I love that! And I know there’s a “What Would Gwyneth Do?” blog. Those little psychological tricks work!

SCBD: In part of the book you go on tons of dates with a man who loves dive bars and restaurants off the beaten track in NYC. What’s the weirdest thing you ate? What’s your favorite?

AS: I’m not into weird foods. That in itself makes me a shitty food writer but I don’t care! I’m never going to choose goat brains over grilled cheese. But the best off-the-grid discovery was this Thai place called Sripraphai in Queens. Freaking insanely delicious. I dream about it.

SCBD: Is there a move in the works?

AS: I have agents in LA working on things, so we’ll see!!!

SCBD: I would recommend Apron Anxiety to any of my friends whether they cook or not. Food and fellowship with loved ones is a heavy theme in the book. In one sentence why should someone read Apron Anxiety?
AS: Thank you so much. I’ve been getting the most amazing feedback. But every now and then someone will say, “Your book was really cute!” or “You’re book was like candy!” – and while I’m thankful for the kind words, I also think to myself…okay, they didn’t totally get it. Because it’s not all about sex and cupcakes or whatever. There’s a tenderness to those pages…a quiet depth. The best readers are like you…people who enjoy the lightness and sweetness of it all, but are also deeply sensitive to the struggle.

Thank you again, for letting me interview you tonight! Reading Apron Anxiety has inspired me in so many ways as a budding food writer and has been a huge encouragement to me to not give up trying recipes in the kitchen. Apron Anxiety has made my top ten favorite books to read. Congratulations on the success of the book, you deserve it!

Security Tag.

Sun, 27 May 2012 23:12:00 -0400

Apron Anxiety has been fluttering between #1 and #3 on Amazon (in “Gastronomy”) since Tuesday … omfg, insane, nuts, can’t believe it, YAY, crazy, pinch me, kiss me, what?!!$@$!@$!!

Off to refuel in Nantucket before my book party in Boston on Thursday. Although I just discovered some high-level-dress-prison-security-tag situation on the left hip of the brilliant, little black number I’m supposed to wear that night. From knockout to stress-out … Sigh.

Ohhh, those who say that I sound “entitled” in the book will just love this post! That’s okay. Reminds me of this paragraph in AA:

As I walk away, through the streets of the Village, looking for fresh air and maybe a falafel, I am oddly unfazed by the experience of being ignored or insulted by the foodie mafia. I will always meet people who don’t like me, or don’t get me, who think I’m dressed like a high-class hooker or raised by wolves. But as all the women I’ve ever admired would say, “At least you’re interesting enough that someone gives a shit.” Which reminds me: There will always be people who think I’m not interesting enough at all.

I’ll sort out the dress jail.

Yesterday, while searching for said silhouette, I saw an old pal walking towards me on Prince. I was wiped, without a speck of makeup, and the last thing I could handle was smalltalk. He’s going to ask me to sign a book…or for my agent’s info…or some idiotic literary advice … Great, I groaned, feeling super-bitchy with low blood sugar.

So I stopped, and smiled, extending my arms for a fake hug, forcing out a phony “Hey you!” And then prepared to be examined, encouraged, applauded …

“Yo, Lys, sorry, can’t talk!” he snapped, brushing right past me. “My wife is giving labor and you, sweetheart, are in my way!!!”

And so it goes. It’s just a book. And it’s all good.

youhadmeatballs: Last Night’s Apron Anxiety Book Launch With...

Sun, 27 May 2012 11:14:57 -0400

youhadmeatballs:

Last Night’s Apron Anxiety Book Launch With Author Alyssa Shelasky

CONGRATULATIONS!

Holy incredible time at my book party. Was SO nervous and somehow let it all go and actually enjoyed...

Thu, 24 May 2012 10:38:00 -0400

Holy incredible time at my book party. Was SO nervous and somehow let it all go and actually enjoyed myself. I’m in the “Fuck it” stage, as one Berkeley writer recently taught me, and guess what, it feels really good! So much to write and tell and sort out inside myself, but for now, here’s a link to a wild Entertainment Weekly story about my life. And I have to share this email from a sweet, new friend. This whole week has been surreal and magical and her story captures that. With all my love and thanks to all, I’m heading out for the biggest breakfast of my life, Alyssa

Here’s what happened: This morning I was down at the Union Square farmers’ market hunting down green tomatoes and stocking up on goat cheese for Tom with only 10 pages to go in the book. About halfway back to the office I realized I left my copy on top of some heirlooms at the tomato stand. I took the subway back downtown and found the young vendor sitting in the truck, already finished with chapter 1. She said she loved the story and needed to know where I bought it—I asked her to hang on 20 mins, grabbed a coffee and quickly finished the final pages so I could give it back to her. (My apologies for getting in the way of a sale!) I could tell she had already connected with you/the book. I’ve never experienced that reaction from someone when I actually knew the person behind the words. Such a cool moment. I had to share :)

Blow Outs and Blow Jobs: Alyssa Shelasky Talks 'Apron Anxiety'

Tue, 22 May 2012 15:40:18 -0400

Blow Outs and Blow Jobs: Alyssa Shelasky Talks 'Apron Anxiety'

Oh yeah, the only housekeeping I can handle … Look for...

Sat, 19 May 2012 22:06:00 -0400

Oh yeah, the only housekeeping I can handle …

Look for Apron Anxiety in this week’s People, Entertainment Weekly and New York Magazine; there’s also a beautiful spread in June’s Elle (Kristen Stewart cover) where everything is perfect, except it looks like I have a broken neck in one shot. That’s fine — my skin looks exceptionally dewy. More lovely press in the works!

I have two grand book parties and they’re open to the public/I’d REALLY love to see any and all AA readers:

New York book launch is Wednesday, May 23 at Powerhouse Arena in Dumbo, 6 to 9. The Meatball Shop is doing the food, along with Georgetown Cupcakes and St. Germain cocktails. Really, it can’t be missed. I bought my dress and wrote my toast. Details here.

Boston book party is Thursday, May 31 at French Connection on Newbury Street, 5 to 8. Details here. Private party to follow for family and friends … currently sorting out what the signature home-sweet-home cocktail will be, as Watermelon Wine Coolers are apparently now déclassé.

Stay tuned for details a San Fran event and other exciting news, with summer around the corner….and my sweet little book on the shelf.

P.S. Just when I think I’m so cool, the kale chips were totally over-salted and inedible. Crap!

Happy and Lucky and Loved.

Sat, 19 May 2012 21:19:00 -0400

I started this blog what feels like another lifetime ago. I wasn’t even sure I’d tell anyone about it at first, and definitely didn’t have any bold ambitions. Honestly, I just needed something to do. A few years later, this Tuesday, my memoir is coming out with the same title, bursting with stories of the same joy, the same ache — just more. I’ve never identified as a blogger, but I was born a writer. And so, because of this page, these recipes, those photos, this font, that song, and all the stuff in between, the creation of Apron Anxiety, everything has worked out. And I mean everything. I recently gave an interview where they asked for five words to describe myself. “Happy,” flew off my tongue. HAPPY. I’m happy because of the book, of course, but it’s so much more. It’s simple: I feel loved. Not just by an incredible man (newsflash!), but by friends and acquaintances who have been so helpful and generous for no other reason other than kindness. I left work on Friday, two weeks off for bookstuff, and my pals at Grub Street, and the mail room, and the candy stand downstairs, sincerely wished me luck on the launch. They all had the same sparkle in their eye as they sent me off on my so-called sabbatical. Now it’s Saturday night and I’m taking a shower, making crispy kale (take an entire head of kale, drizzle it in *good olive oil, add salt and pepper, bake at 375 for about 10 minutes… better than a bag of Terra Chips, I swear 2 g-d), and staying in. Need to be rested for the week to come. Oddly enough, I’m not even nervous. And I don’t think I’m lying. Life is so good as is; anything more is just ego. Goodnight world.

Photo credit: Jen Gotch

Morning! Not going to pretend I didn’t get into this song...

Sat, 28 Apr 2012 10:25:49 -0400

Morning! Not going to pretend I didn’t get into this song via American Idol but anyway I dug up the original (along with the rest of the world) which is amazing, and this IngridM version rocks too. Listen to words - holy shit who hasn’t been there, on one end or the other - come on now. I’m supposed to be blogging about good reviews and food-porn and purple carrots and book parties all that good stuff, but it’s Saturday and just want to let it all goooooooooo….

Easy Come, Easy Go.

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 23:22:01 -0400

The things I do, I do hard. When I laugh, I howl. When I cry, I wail. When I kiss, I shiver. If you’re my friend, I’ll fight your battles and find your answers. If you’re my passion, I’ll write you, sing you, shop you, spin you, smoke you, and sweat you until all the muscles of my mind, body or wallet wear out. If you’re him: You have it good. Hard-core commitment - to the things that truly matter, though nothing less - comes easy. Yet it’s this all-or-nothing mentality that kept me away from cooking until I was 32 years old. I wasn’t into it. Foodstuff was fucking lame. And that was the end of that. We are afraid of what we don’t know. Until I got desperate. You all know the story (if you don’t, buy the book!): I taught myself to cook as a last resort. And it changed everything. But unlike the rest, I don’t cook to extremes. There’s no tension or seduction or inner-rage involved, which is odd because I used to thrive off that stuff. Nah. There’s a balance, a kinda, a sorta, a maybe when it comes to me and the kitchen. I cook sometimes, if I feel like it, if I’m inspired, if I’m - oh I don’t know - hungry? I manage my fridge the same, relaxed way I do my closet (fashion being the one category I’ve never been manic about). A few nice choices. Understated, but exciting enough. All good things, not much fuss. It’s awesome existing in the gorgeous grey, for once. Sometimes I even think about phasing out of the food world professionally. I think I’m fine with or without it. We’ll see. Tomorrow I’m judging a grilled cheese contest at Artisanal, and I’m honored. But the other judges are all hyper-ambitious types who know and care so much more than me. They’re committed, and I’m coasting. It’s interesting. Although, that’s the beauty of food, isn’t it? There’s a place-setting for everyone. I just hope mine has no mayo.

Can’t find the source of this photo but I love it. Hope...

Sun, 08 Apr 2012 10:35:46 -0400

Can’t find the source of this photo but I love it. Hope everyone had a beautiful Passover or Easter or Weekend or whatever. I was kind of in a weird mood, but that’s okay. About one month til the book launch, so maybe it’s a little anxiety over Anxiety. Think I just need to bake something, or brunch something, or lay on a picnic blanket. Really just wanted an excuse to post this pic. xx

Win A Free Class (For Two!) at Corkbuzz

Mon, 02 Apr 2012 20:12:00 -0400

I have no interest in ever becoming a “food snob,” sorry, but a “wine snob” is a secret aspiration. Wine talk - at its best - can be a blast … Taste the Ryan Gosling of reds … a rose that will be your best friend, then blow your husband … this white is a paranoid schizophrenic and she’s off her meds … I mean, can we really go there with, like, ramps? Whatever! That said, I’ve become a big fan of Corkbuzz Wine Studio, an elegant wine bar where experts are as involved as you want them to be in the education of your evening vino. You can go to drink alone, on a date, with a group - and you can also go for a class. Classes are smart and sexy; you stumble away all worldly and sophisticated.

Corkbuzz’s owner, Master Sommelier Laura Maniec, has generously offered an Apron Anxiety reader free admission (for two people) to any of her April classes. (Normally would cost $150, or more.) Just email ME your Apron Anxiety pre-sale receipt at ApronAnxiety@gmail.com, with a few sentences about your most amazing wine experience - a 3-dollar bottle swiped from Walmart, or a big, bold Barolo with that evil, incredible boy. Tell me.

This weekend, I’ll announce the winner! So raise your glass, buy a book, and let the games begin.

The Show Must Go On

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 11:25:00 -0400

Twenty minutes before hair and makeup were supposed to arrive at my apartment, and one hour before the fashion team, prop stylists and photographers were set to buzz from below, I got the call.

Someone I loved - very much - had died. He was sick, ALS, and it was time. But that didn’t mean my heart wasn’t ripped out and torn apart.

Immediately, I started to cry thick, hard unstoppable tears. I’m sure everyone I grew up with cried thick, hard, unstoppable tears that morning too.

As more calls came in about wakes and funerals and other awful things, I realized that I had not yet showered for the big group of stylish people who were coming over to make me beautiful.

I hadn’t swept my floors, picked up the Perrier, baked a banana bread, or prepped myself at all for the reporter who went on a limb and made this magazine article come alive for me.

Sweaty and shaky, I didn’t know what the fuck to do. But I chose to pull it together. That felt most responsible.

The make-up artist was first to arrive. She was especially kind, given my red and puffy eyes. The rest of the team strolled in and I filled them in on my morning, trying not to sound too morbid. I might have been repeating myself … he always believed in me … I don’t remember.

Late in the night, the photo-shoot wrapped.

It was gorgeous, and, I think, glamorous, and I tried my very best to look and feel the part. Somehow I cooked a good dinner. There were smiles, flashes, and high fives. Everyone got what they needed.

But I wasn’t quite myself.

I attempted to make a toast - rich, witty words I had imagined myself saying - but my voice shook so bad that I sat back down.

Forgot to do and say and cook and bake half the things I dreamed of in anticipation of this article, which I’d orchestrated in my head every single night for the last few months.

Though, I think it all went fine.

Yesterday was the funeral for my dear friend who was a hero to me and my family for so many reasons. During one of the exquisite eulogies delivered at the church, someone reminded the hundred of mourners of this beautiful man’s favorite quote:

“Courage is grace under pressure.”

In his memory and honor, those words will continue to guide me through life and love, friendship and fortune, and maybe even hair and makeup.

Just had to share this photograph of Faye Dunaway by Terry...

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 09:24:00 -0400

Just had to share this photograph of Faye Dunaway by Terry O’Neill shown at the Morrison Hotel Gallery in Soho. She caught my eye and now I can’t stop thinking about her. I might even say that I’ve never felt such a connection w/ a work of art before … a luny thing to say, I realize, as she’s sitting at The Beverly Hills Hotel with last night’s Oscar, and I’m sitting in Dumbo drinking instant coffee in cupcake PJs. But hey, that’s art. The big glossy is a couple thousand dollars, which I’d obviously have to beg, borrow and steal (reason #412 to buy the book - just kiddin’ - kinda), but hopefully one day she’ll be mine. xxAlyssa

FREE CUPCAKES FOR YOU

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 23:02:10 -0500

Pre-order Apron Anxiety, from any retailer (see links above), send proof of your purchase, along with your mailing address, to ApronAnxiety@gmail.com to win a Georgetown Cupcake gift card valid for one FREE, luscious, sublime, FREE, heavenly, my favorite and FREE cupcake at any GTC location. First 50 emails get the goods - it’s so easy. Buy the book, win a cupcake!

One Day I Will Talk About Something Else

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 22:53:30 -0500

Until then …

“I loved this book. It’s partly a cautionary tale about getting involved with young career-driven men and a love story about a woman and the city she loves and leaves and loves again. And finally, it’s about good friends, a loving family, and the importance and good fortune Alyssa has for having both. Oh, and there’s a great recipe for mac and cheese.”

—JOHN DELUCIE, chef/proprietor The Lion, Crown restaurants, and author of The Hunger: A Memoir of an Accidental Chef

Here Ya Go, World.

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 22:31:55 -0500

The only way to write a book is to conquer the idea of letting go…so….even though I’m totally horrified to hit SEND, here is the first chapter of Apron Anxiety! Just remember, it only gets better, juicier, sadder, happier, sexier, deeper, darker, drunker and more delicious. I’d be hiding under my bed for the next ten years if I didn’t truly believe so.