Veggie Fried Wimp
Boston and back in 24-hours and only one regret.
It has nothing to do with our Longmeadow reunion. That was perfection drenched in Bud Light and mojitos. We got together to remember our friend who died on 9/11, Jean Roger, and in her honor, we laughed our ass off and cried our eyes out. We felt her there, the heart of the party, like she always was and always will be.
My friends from home are the funniest, raunchiest, most wonderful people in the WORLD. We’d do anything for each other. I literally gave the shirt off my back to my friend Anzo. Literally. I hopped in a cab with no shirt on my back. (*I did have a leather jacket on…).
What I regret was what happened after I got back to NYC. Okay, I eat Chinese food maybe twice a year. I know, weird, especially because I’m Jewish and it’s Sunday night…I should have this shit down! But for some reason, I have to be severely exhausted/drained for a craving. A heavy — albeit it beautiful — weekend like this will do the trick.
I asked some wicked foodie friends where to go, determined to be MSG-daring because that’s the new me. Many suggested Szechuan Gourmet on 39th, which is where I went. There was a positive Frank Bruni review in the window. He, and everyone else, said to go with: 1) sliced fish filets in chili sauce 2) crispy lamb 3) minced pork.
We all know I’m determined to become a more sophisticated eater. I’m writing a freaking book about it. So there’s really no excuse for why I FLAKED when I got to the counter. I preempted by order by saying, “Nothing spicy, not even a little!” and “I don’t eat pork!” and “Brown rice, please.” I might as well have said: Hi, I’m Alyssa and I’m epicuriously impotent.
Like a stoned college girl with a slight eating disorder, I ended up with: steamed vegetable dumplings, tofu stir-fry with extra veggies and a vat of generic General Tso’s. Everything was, of course, delicious. But that’s not the point.
Can you ever fully appreciate the culinary scene if you’re an unadventurous eater? Or is there something to be said for..staying faithful to your foods?
What do you think?
Photo: Jen Gotch
